Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Disturbing Dreams pt 2.

Here's the dream that I had before the car crash dream.

I'm back at home in my garage when I hear some scratching from the door that leads to my backyard.  I go to check out what the noise is, and I see this 8 year old boy.  He was the one scratching, and he's making inaudible noises with an emotionless expression on his face.  Behind him hovers an old creepy man laughing, like he's done something evil.  It immediately clicks in my mind that there was some kind of abuse going on and the boy was no longer normal.  I was enraged.  I was about to punch the old man in the face but they both just vanished. 

Flash to the beach where I'm with some friends and some people I knew in high school .  I'm telling them about this weird creepy man that they should be watching out for when one guy  starts saying how he's a pedophile too.  I was like WTF and I start beating the crap out of his face.  I felt kind of restrained because I didn't want to hurt him because we were friends and maybe he was just joking.  Then the old creepy man comes up behind us smiling his horrible grin and I just snap.  I'm pummeling the guy into the ground kicking and thrashing, tearing him apart.  Usually in dreams, when I get in a fight, I can't move my limbs.  But this one was different.  All my rage was expressed into an actual physical beat down.  (It's funny how I'm feeling angry as I type this). 

Flash to my front door, my mom was suggesting she should go talk to the guy to try to talk some sense into him.  I'm pissed off yelling that he should die and people like that shouldn't be shown remorse.  But she was pretty hard set on reasoning with the old man. 

phewf! it feels good to get that all out.  These dreams came out of no where, I can not see any direct connection from these dreams to real life. 

Disturbing Dreams pt 1

I haven't been able to recall dreams I've had when I wake up, until recently.  And I'm pretty sure the only reason is it was disturbing and involved heightened emotions that I was able to remember them when I woke up.  I'll start with the most recent.

I was back in the Bay Area yay! but in this part of the dream, I was about to make the trip back to Oregon.  My family and friends were all driving out to some restaurant for lunch in the East Bay before I left and it was a sunny day.  I was in my MINI with my brother next to me, because he's coming up with me for the summer (true in real life!)  My dad was in front driving a Toyota RAV4, when all of a sudden we come up to this corner and his car completely flips over in the turn and his body just ejects lifelessly out of the car.  (I know its just a dream.. it pains me still as I type it right now).  At first I feel shocked like omg what the hell happeend.  I run out of my car and I spot one of his arms hanging on a tree.  I run to it and pick it up.  I turn around and see my dad lying there motionless and it hits me.  I start bawling out of control like I had just lost my dad.

The crazy part was when I walked over to his body with his arm in my hands.  He stands up slowly and he still has both of his arms!! WHAT?! I'm all looking at his severed arm, and back at his still attached injured arms trying to make sense of it.  I remember thinking it must be some physical metaphor of the 'phantom arm' effect.  He starts to come to his senses and slowly grabs his severed arm and places it within his 'phantom arm' and it sticks.  I'm relieved that hes alive and am about to take him to the hospital but then he refuses!  He decides to call his brother for some chinese healing methods.  I was like wtf! you can't risk your life to do that!  and we start this argument about how he should go about seeking treatment.

Crazy Nightmare.  It was pretty emotionally draining, and I'm glad it was only a dream.

Yesterday I had another disturbing dream too.